How to Devastate a Jewish Mother

Of all my boys, LL comes in for punishment the most often–mostly because he does the most foolish things, like order a pizza all for himself, decide after it’s been delivered and paid for that he’d rather have an omelet, and then, when told it was pizza or bust, take the pizza and smear it all over his face and head rather than eat it (and that, my friends, is what ended the promise not to yell at my kids).

So, how does LL react to his three-month pizza ban (as well as the scolding for losing the awesome Original 6 hockey hat we bought for him–twice?).

“Mama, when I grow up, I am never getting married. And what’s more, I am never, ever having kids.”

So there you go, parents–just when you think you’ve got the upper hand, they hit you where it hurts: right in the vagina balls.

Goal!